"No wonder you today so happy."

words Shirlyn said in passing stuck in my head.
by just existing, you make it alright.





contrary to this morning and afternoon and evening, I'm feeling super pissed/ feel like crying my eyes out now.
and as much as I want to blog about it, I can't.
I can't solve it myself but that person making me upset all the time doesn't want to help himself either.
if he ain't helping himself, even if people were willing to sacrifice themselves to help him, we can't save him.
but that's what we're doing, making sacrifices, mentally, emotionally and physically every single freaking day and he doesn't change.
says he tries to, but he never changes.
I wonder why we won't give up.
maybe it's worth the pain now so he saves himself in time,
but I really don't think so anymore.

I hate you but I can't.

happy's an illusion.